Opinion: Out from your comfort zone

Have you ever feel so suffocated in one place or condition where you always have to be there? 

The feel like you want to letting go the pressuring aura and the stressed feeling around you because you have to be there like every day, take an example like when you are in a clique or a group of friends that you always go hanging out with them almost every time.

Truly you will ended up so attaching with them since you guys getting out and doing lot of things most of the time and do all the fun parts, sharing stories and jokes and everything, isn’t the feeling is amazing? That you have these friends to play with you?

But what will happen, if in other times there’s trouble occurred in this friendship? It might be really okay if it’s happen once or twice isn’t it? (Oh, come on there’s no friendship without flaws isn’t it? I do believe  when the time come there will be misunderstand or miscommunicate happen in a way) and once you and your friends settled it back, everything will be alright and come back to normal or your friendship will way stronger than before. That what’s usually things works in a healthy friendship.

The wrong thing is when you are the only one who always feel like the one who always get blamed for everything happen in a group or in any case you no longer feel happy by the situation in the friendship that you carry on, nor the problems that happening or the conversation and the stuffs that they’re doing is so not you, hence you can’t stop to go on this habits because you feel like you obligate to do all the things with them.

You feels like it will turn into a big sin if you not hanging out with them, because you feel like they’re the only people that you can hang out with, the insecurity inside your mind that make you feel so afraid if they will hate you if you not playing with them. Even honestly , it doesn’t really satisfied yourself, you don’t really laughs with them but you have to, you don’t really like something that they decided but you have to follow since it’s the majority of the group votes.

If you say yes, or keep nodding till the last paragraphs which you just read, it’s mean you definitely need to out from your comfort zone, yes this is what we call as a “comfort zone” the zone that you feel like you need to stay there but you don’t feel really good most of the time or in short you only got temporary happiness. 

Did you really feel happy or you just get so comfortable?

I have been in those situation before, the situation that force me in the zone that I don’t feel really comfortable with but I have to stay there since I want to do something with them and I can't do that thing if I don’t stay with them, it’s easy to faking up your smiles or your laughs but what the point to do all that things all the time, and I feel not happy at all?

So I decided to slowly letting go, those precious thing (well it was the most precious thing once in my life).

To be honest, I’m not really good in approaching people so easily or making friends with someone so easily with everybody so once I’ve have friends I really treasure them so much and love them. I tend to spoil my friends who I care the most, I even often sacrificing my selfishness first to help them. Or in any other case it seems like I often take the bullets for them but apparently they also the one who pull the triggers. It’s not like I’m seeking for a thank you or compliments for what I’ve done to them most of the time.

But at least a little appreciation would be loved isn’t it? Well if you asking me now specifically about the reason, I might be forgot them already (and I feel blessed because of that). It takes me lot of times to gain my confident after I decide to at least make a distance with them, at first I do lost my trust to people and I distance myself almost to everyone. The abrupt idea of questions about having friends is a totally bullshit is sometimes pop out in my mind. “Why’d I should have a good friend when they ended up hurting myself?”

“Do, I need to be a little selfish myself so they will not stepped on me?” or ”is it okay if I speak what is in my mind frankly, without makes anyone hurt?” After all that things, I take into conclusion that everyone deserves to be happy and feel satisfied with what they doing. Everyone should appreciate about how you are and they totally have no rights to judge you or what you should be. You have all the rights to walk away from them if you no longer feel happiness in there.

In any case if you feel it cannot be solved by talking with them, and for reminder making up status on social media won’t solve the problems, it’s just will make things worse, moreover when you pretend you are okay after that and when those friends asking, you just slyly changing the topics that you not talking about them but someone else, It not only you will hurt your own feeling but it will hurt them as well don’t you think? They’re humans as well, they do have feelings like us especially when they just read the status that obviously refer to them :)

I do have lots of friends now, I’m no longer build a brick wall for my friendships with everyone now, it’s just I don’t really want to make any strong attached strings with them if I don’t know them very well. (Hey, I do still love all my friends :) )

Letting go something is not always sounds so saddening and tragic, sometimes it’s the most right decision you have to do, because not everyone are mean to be in your life, so you don’t have to feel bad with this, believe me, it’s really okay. It’s not like they’re the only ones you have in this world isn’t it? I’m not telling you it will easy but once you done it you will feel the freedom and content :)

Remember, your happiness is important as well.

Good Night :*